Driving away in circles

It’s getting confusing. I swear we’ve been down this road before.

Some of what I perceive is imagined, like yesterday’s distance. There was no gap, I just thought there was. Or so he says.

Tonight he reassured me it was ok. But then he left so quickly I am left wondering what he was running from. Time? Me? Pain? Or, perhaps he was running toward something. Personal space? Familiarity? Another stressor to block out the one he left behind?

I can’t help but think I did something wrong. I don’t know what my offense was, but I’m certain the mood changed in the last 10 minutes of this evening because of me.

And now it’ll be at least a week before I will be able to discern what just happened. 140 characters at a time across an 8-hour time difference does not a good, deep, revealing conversation make.

I just hope he has a bit of time for some reading before he leaves. Carefully planned words left sitting in the dark for 8 days will make me even more anxious.

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